Are Coyotes Like Teenagers?

coyote-licking-nose

The coyote was hiding in the shadows of the desert brush. It was early in the morning and I was taking my white poodle, Sophie, out on the lawn to do her duty.

All of a sudden, Sophie began to run toward the brush. The coyote began to stealthily move toward my dog. I spotted him just in the nick of time and scooped Sophie up in my arms protectively.Then, I roared like a lion and the coyote turned and ran off.

We live in the middle of of the city in Tucson, Arizona. We have nine coyotes in our neighborhood. They play with and rip up our newspapers, gloves, and anything else that we leave out. Our huge population of rabbits has been reduced significantly. The coyotes are healthy, big, playful, smart, and dangerous.

So, how does this relate to teenagers?

Just as I can’t stop the coyote from wanting to eat my dog, I can’t stop my teenager from growing up. She needs to find her own identity that is separate from me and our family. She needs to prioritize her friends or her “pack”. She needs to learn adult skills like driving and she needs to learn how to safely navigate the world with its dangers and its wonderfulness.

Let me explain more……….

My teenager and I took a road trip to California recently. It was a spontaneous trip and we left in the mid afternoon on a Thursday. It takes about six hours to get to San Diego from Tucson. However, it took us about nine hours to get there due to the weather challenges, my terror, and the need for comfort food!

My daughter has her learners permit and we thought that she could get a lot of highway driving experience on this trip. What I didn’t anticipate was the rain, the fog through the mountains, and the trillions of trucks that take advantage of the nighttime lack of traffic.

At times, while she was driving I was terrified. My neck and shoulders were not just tense but locked up. My heart was beating fast and I was barely breathing. This happened as we were passing trucks, exiting off the highway, and driving in pitch blackness in the pouring rain.

I would have felt much more relaxed and at ease if I had done all the driving. If I could have waved a magic wand and turned her into an experienced, expert driver, I would have done it!

But I knew that she needed to learn. I must admit that I found myself at times making scared noises, jumping, and not acting calm and collected like a coach “should.”

If I wanted her to master driving, I needed to calm myself down! We all make mistakes as we are learning a new skill. I couldn’t change the reality that she was a new driver. I needed to release my fear.

So, I did. How did I?

I used Ask and Receive (A&R).

We all have situations in which we are not in control. We all have people in our lives that we can’t change. We can’t change our partners, our bosses, our parents, or our friends. Only ourselves can we really change.

You can adapt this script to any emotion or situation. Here is what I did in the car (silently so that I wouldn’t disturb my daughter’s concentration):

There’s a part of my being that already knows how to heal and release this terror, what it represents, all of its roots, and its point of entry.

That part of my being is willing to inform the rest of me now.

It is doing so now with grace and ease.

My mind, body, and spirit are receiving this information.

Information transfer is now complete.

Then I did it on some of my physical symptoms like:

There’s a part of my being that already knows how to heal and release this tension on the right side of my neck, what it represents, all of its roots, and its point of entry.

That part of my being is willing to inform the rest of me now.

It is doing so now with grace and ease.

My mind, body, and spirit are receiving this information.

Information transfer is now complete.

And:

There’s a part of my being that already knows how to heal and release this tension in my shoulders, what it represents, all of its roots, and its point of entry.

That part of my being is willing to inform the rest of me now.

It is doing so now with grace and ease.

My mind, body, and spirit are receiving this information.

Information transfer is now complete.

Then I went back some of my remaining emotions:

There’s a part of my being that already knows how to heal and release this anxiety, what it represents, all of its roots, and its point of entry.

That part of my being is willing to inform the rest of me now.

It is doing so now with grace and ease.

My mind, body, and spirit are receiving this information.

Information transfer is now complete.

Then I finished off with a good, positive intention:

There is a part of my being that already knows how to feel calm, relaxed, yet alert while teaching my daughter how to drive.

That part of my being is willing to inform the rest of me now.

It is doing so now with grace and ease.

My mind, body, and spirit are receiving this information.

Information transfer is now complete.

And another positive intention, I added was:

There is a part of my being that already knows how to communicate clearly and calmly driving tips to my daughter.

That part of my being is willing to inform the rest of me now.

It is doing so now with grace and ease.

My mind, body, and spirit are receiving this information.

Information transfer is now complete.

After I did this, my daughter and I had a much better driving experience together.

Please try this in any relationship or situation that is up for you.

Let me know how it works by commenting down below.

With Love and Gratitude,

Pam

  4 comments for “Are Coyotes Like Teenagers?

  1. Brenda Hansen
    November 23, 2015 at 11:40 am

    Since learning these five wonderful sentences I’ve used them again and again for emotional and physical situations of all kinds. It always leaves me marvelling at how comforted and relieved I feel, how my mind and body relax into the assurance that all is well, and how my sense of balance and command of the situation is restored. Its effect is gentle and subtle, sometimes not noticed for a while, and then the awareness comes again that I have connected with that greatest part of my Self that is limitless, all-knowing and infinite.

    • Pam Altaffer
      November 23, 2015 at 9:44 pm

      What a beautiful description of the benefits of using Ask & Receive so consistently and for such a broad range of symptoms! Wow. This is the reason why Sandi, Tom and I want to spread the word of using A&R–to help people feel the way you described so eloquently. My heart feels so happy to hear this!
      Thank you for the positive feedback.

  2. anne kofman
    November 23, 2015 at 6:37 pm

    Love it…will share with my son and his 17 year old twin daughters/double challenge!! Not that they’re open to my woo woo ways, but can’t hurt. Use this for all sorts of physical symptoms and almost always change!! Like itches/ there’s a part of my body than knows how to be itch free and it is now informing …..etc. Works almost everytime with ease…Just popped into my mind to use when have trouble falling back to sleep in a.m. when awake at 4 a.m. Thanks for the reminder. Teenage thing caught my eye.

    • Pam Altaffer
      November 23, 2015 at 9:56 pm

      Yay about you loving it! I use A&R every single night to go to sleep. I usually do about 1-3 rounds and I’m sound asleep. I start the protocol with something like: There is a part of my being that already knows how to fall asleep in the next few minutes, sleep deeply, oh so restfully, and long.
      I am thrilled that you are finding so much success with physical issues and that you are using it when the you notice symptoms are just forming.Very smart!
      I hope your son receives your loving information with openness!

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